Guilt

Why do Moms always feel guilt.

Guilt because I have to clean rather than play.
Guilt becuase one child has colored on her pillows and I have to punish.
Guilt because same child has also colored on the remote control and I have to punish.
(yes, I know...magic eraser.)
Guilt because they may watch too much television.
Guilt because I get irritated when they wake up in the night and I have to get out of bed.
Guilt because I do not want to buy "Princess" cereal anymore because it' s too high in sugar. (when it's what one child talks about before going to bed. "I'm going to have my princess cereal for breakfast tomorrow!!")
Guilt because I couldn't buy Thomas or Sweet Streets at Target tonight because I'm a stay at home Mom.
Guilt because I did buy two tank tops.
Guilt because they will never have a dog.
Guilt because our house is not clean enough.
Guilt because our furniture is not secure to the walls.
Guilt because I spank. (if you don't like it, I don't care.)
Guilt because I just ate too much ice cream...oh wait, that has nothing to do with being a Mom, or does it?
Guilt because I occasionally have dinner with friends.
Guilt because I have meetings a couple of times a month.
Guilt because I'd rather grocery shop alone, although I seldom do.
Guilt because I'm going out of town this weekend. (tremondous guilt...tremondous.)
Guilt because they wake up wanting me and I won't be here for them.
Guilt because I take my kids to a germ infested childcare so I can work out.
Guilt because I eat too much ice cream after working out.
Guilt because I'm not certain I hugged them enough today.
Guilt becuase I'm not certain I kissed them enough today.
Guilt because I'm not certain they know just how much I love them.
Guilt because they want to go outside and swing and I don't take them.
Guilt because it only took me four minutes to come up with this list.
Guilt because I feel guilty.

I'm tired of feeling guilty.

One Hundred

This is my 100th entry.

This weekend was a great weekend filled with family and food. On two seperate occasions I had (alot) of ice cream. I've had brats, chips, cookies, Little Debbie Nutty Bars, biscuits and gravy, french toast, and spaghetti, just to name a few things. I went a little nuts. The good news is that I am completely full and hopefully will never eat again! :-)

My sister, Sarah, her husband and their little one, Ethan came to visit this weekend. It was great to spend such quality time with them. She's expecting a girl in July, so we don't think they'll see Anna and Noah again until September or perhaps Thanksgiving, so we tried to cram in as much quality time as possible. It was lots of fun. I have some pictures to share.

And do I even need to mention the heat?? I LOVED it. I don't know why, heat is typically something I can not tolerate, but this heat I really enjoyed and appreciated. There is (was) definitely something wrong with our central air, we think we fixed it. It was really warm in our house, despite our best efforts, it's finally much better in here. (quite cold, actually!)

Oh, and the kids are sick again. I'm getting really tired of this. I know it's because of the child care at the gym. I can't help but think that I am risking their health for a healthier me, it doesn't seem fair, I'm feeling really selfish about this situation and I'm not sure how to remedy it. I just wish people would stop bringing their sick kids in. Oh wait, I guess I'm bringing mine in tomorrow. See???? It's a vicious cycle.

By the way, I'm still watching Grey's Anatomy, 8 episodes down from season one, 1 more episode to go. It's just awesome.

Noah shooting some hoops. He's very athletic.

Anna enjoying the summer weather by the koi pond. Can you tell she was posing.

A very happy boy heading to Grandma's house!

Anna LOVES TO PLAY IN WATER. She has always been this way. Some kids would get so upset if their Mom started spaying them with the hose (Noah) but Anna says "do it again." We played for a long time. She's loves water. We were at my Mom's house, so we didn't have a bathing suit. I guess you don't need one after all!

Hot.

Cooling off with some chocolate ice cream!

Mommy sprayed me. In my defense, I never directly sprayed him, sometimes the drops just fell on him, other times he would run towards the water accidentally.

Ethan dancing and Noah watching.

Sarah: due July 31st
Happy boy.

This picture was taken last Wednesday right before I took the kids to Wal-Mart. Anna put on a hat and Noah said "I want a hat" so Anna, the fashion genious she is, gave him one and put it on him. They posed for me and he promptly removed his pink hat. Anna proceeded to Wal-Mart wearing the hat.

Anna posing with mittens on this morning.

Grey's Anatomy

Alright, we finally started watching Grey's Anatomy, from show NUMBER #1 from the first season. Brian and I are hooked. We've watched the first six shows in the last four nights, hence the lack of blogging! It's an awesome show! I can't wait to watch more!!!

Generically speaking (is that a word?)

On Wednesday, the kids and I went to Wal-Mart for a few midweek staples. One of the items on the list was Cascade dishwasher detergent, I even had a coupon. I pushed the semi-trailer 2 seater grocery cart to the detergents when I noticed how much cheaper the generic brand of dishwasher detergent was in comparison to Cascade, even with the coupon. We are talking over one dollar difference. In fact, I noticed the off brand was laughing at my coupon, laughing and saying "if you buy Cascade, you're an IDIOT." Well, I didn't want to be an idiot, so I bought the cheaper brand and guess what? My dishes are dirty. There are many things that I buy the off brand, for instance, I think Target brand diapers are the bomb and the diaper wipes. Contact solution, applesauce, cereal and some paper towels I will try and buy the off brand. However, there are some items I will not change, like my coffee. My dear husband once tried to trick me by switching the off brand into my Folgers can. That went over like a whore in church. Needless to say he knew how serious that offense was when a police officer showed up at our door wanting to arrest him for fraud, not to mention the trust issues that resulted in. But we've moved forward. I think.

Somethings are great, somethings are not, somethings work just the same. Too bad it cost money to figure it out.

Oh and P.S. I rinse every dish before placing it in the dishwashwer. It's not me, it's the soap.

AI Review

Like I could blog tonight and not mention American Idol. I am so impressed with the season finale. I was completely entertained the ENTIRE two hours. Was it really two hours? It flew by. I loved ALL of the special guests, especially Prince. I almost peed my pants! (seriously, I had to pee but I was holding it, way too lazy to pause the show and go.) I knew it was him right away and I was in denial until the first close up. It was awesome! I loved Mary J. Blige, but I was very much hoping it would be Bono. I told Brian "if Bono shows up I swear I'll have a stroke!" Then the "curtain" opened and I threw my hands against my face...it was Mary, I was a little disappointed, but that's okay, Mary J. was at the Oprah show when I was there in February, I enjoyed her performance. The Clay Aiken moment with that CREEP CREEPY CREEPY guy singing was so stinkin' hilarious. I had to replay his reaction, but forward through his creepiness. And my hat is off to Chris for not only sounding amazing but looking amazing. You are the wind beneath my wings. In the end, when Katharine and Taylor were singing "I had the time of my life," I couldn't help but picture Chris singing and dancing merrily to that and I have to say I was a little grateful for his early dismissal, seeing him sing the melody would have been wrong, a sin.
Produce that album Chris, I'll be sure to buy it...or at least copy it from the library.

Luke warm

I'm definitely feeling luke warm about American Idol. I lost alot of my passion for the show when my boyfriend was voted off, then I lost alot of what I had left when Elliot was booted, now.....I just want Taylor to win to hear a different kind of music on Idol, to see a different face. I am enjoying his purple coat, too.

Now why in the world is the show going to last two hours tomorrow night? Oh, by the way, any finalist that I have voted for, has never won. I voted for Taylor tonight. I voted for Clay, I did not vote for Fantasia, but I didn't vote for her competitor, either, and I voted for Bo. I can't believe I have to live without this show until NEXT JANUARY! Another summer gone by, a Halloween, Christmas, New Years, Anna and Noah turning 3 and 4! I can't even imagine! Somehow it will be here before we know it.

I leave you with pictures.

Noah looking like his Daddy.
Anna and Mommy discovering Horsey back rides! We've never done it before! She loved it!
Noah coloring with his fashionable pink head band.
Anna looking like Mommy with her cell phone.

No Roger! No Rerun! No Rent!

I've been on blogger strike. I am striking because I need better pay, (or just pay) improved benefits, maybe a gift certificate for Pottery Barn and a better work enviroment, perhaps a maid would do.

Okay, no strike. I've just been scrapbooking! I'm trying to get my cruise scrapbook finished before my Mommy's Group meets tomorrow, so I've been spending all of my free time scrapbooking. This is the first time I've actually scrapbooked! It's hard work and freakin' expensive. Too expensive. I think I'm going to quit. :-)

I have a few random things to blog about, I'll do it using bullets, if you don't mind.

• My eyebrows. I need a good waxing. I'm quite certain if I ran into a raccoon, it would try to burrow itself above my eyes. It's only been one month, I don't know if it's the testosterone I'm taking or what, but I need help!
• I cut Anna's hair. Two inches. Well, 2 inches on one side, 1.5 on the other. You can't even tell that I cut any. I wish I had that problem.
• Anna is still running a temperature, today it crept up to 101, it's so strange because she is showing NO symptoms of any kind except a fever, Noah is starting to run a slight fever and even I had one last night. I called the doctor and they said if it gets any higher to call them and bring her in.
• I did alot of landscaping this weekend. It's so nice when it's done, but it is so tiring.
• My first week of maintaining my goal weight has been a little difficult. I kinda feel like something mentally happens when you hit your goal, I hope I can change that especially since it looks like I may actually start working for Weight Watchers. This has been in the works for about 4 weeks now, the ball is just now rolling, especially since I hit my goal. The pay will be horrendous at first, I mean I may as well be volunteering, but by mid summer that could change. We haven't decided if it would be worth any childcare cost, there are definitely pros and cons, I'll keep you posted.
• I went to garage sales this weekend. I happened upon a bedding set ideal for a baby girl in perfect condition. I bought it for my sister who is expecting a girl in July. This bedding set is still available at Babies R Us, the cost for the bedding alone is $179. I got the bedding set and the mobile for SIX DOLLAS. YEE HAW! Now THAT is a good deal!
• Okay, I'm lying. I felt so bad about only paying six dollars that I gave the girl 7 dollars. I'm an idiot and I suck at garage sales.
• Testosterone. I'm not taking testosterone. I can't believe you fell for that.
• No Roger! No Rerun! No Rent! Please tell me someone appreciates the name of this blog entry!
  

Victory

Tonight I attended my Weight Watcher meeting and much to my surprise...I have hit my lifetime goal. I'm extremely excited and kinda scared. My week was one of my more difficult weeks as most of it I have been sick. I wasn't a good weight watcher, on two occasion I grabbed 3-4 chocolate covered graham cracker cookies and sat down with them as if I weren't on Weight Watchers at all. (believe me, there were other sins committed besides the cookie sin) However, these past 3 days I have worked really hard trying to resist all fattening substances from entering my mouth. I only had to lose .4 lbs to hit my goal and I lost .8. I say I'm surprised, but then again, I'm not sure how surprised I am. For the past fifteen weeks I have been living and breathing the Weight Watcher program, not just trying to lose weight, but also trying to figure out how this lifestyle will fit into my life for the rest of my life. It's a scary thought. And I'm not sure I have the answers, I am a bit fearful. Afterall, I have fallen often the wagon many times before, but I've never been driving the truck that is pulling the wagon which is where I feel I am right now. I have lost 30.4 pounds.

Last night I said two unhealthy things to Brian.
Number One. "If I don't make my goal tomorrow night, we are going to get pizza and then we are going to Coldstone Creamery." I think he mumbled something about me being an idiot.
Number Two. "If I make my goal, we are going to Redamak's with the kids." Redamaks serves the WORLDS GREATEST Cheeseburgers and they are located just across the border in Michigan. Brian and I go there every year on August 7th, our anniversary. I challenge anybody's cheeseburgers to go up against Redamak's, many people agree. Wow, I really got sidetracked there. I love cheeseburgers.

ANYWAY, those two things that I said were so unhealthy, they really were, but I couldn't figure out what I should do to reward myself for making my goal...until sitting at the meeting tonight. I'm going to get a massage and maybe a manicure and pedicure! (I just added the mani/pedi part, I hope Brian reads this!) I've never had a massage or a pedicure and I think this is the perfect reward, don't you agree?! :-) Now when these events will take place.....that's up to the checkbook!

I returned to the gym today. Illness hit this house on May 1st, that's how long it's been since I've been to the gym! It was good to back. At the gym, I had two signs that my return was welcomed, the very first parking space was available and then when I checked in the girl at the counter said I won a prize during member appreciation week, I won a key chain! I felt those were all good signs.

I have attached before and after pictures of me. The before pictures were taken in January of 2006.

BEFORE

AFTER

VICTORIOUS

Normalcy

Today could not have been more exciting for me. No sickness. (well, not much) No preparing for a trip. No medicine or runny noses. No unpacking. A normal day. Cleaning. Organizing. Just getting the house back in order. Making dinner. Playtime. Bathtime. Bedtime.
A really good day.

Noah is doing amazing. It's hard to believe this little boy was so sick not one week ago. His penis looks 100% healed. Praised God. I showed "the picture" to some family and none of them were prepared for it, no matter how I described it before hand. It was much worse. I would share the picture, but that probably wouldn't be such a good idea. It was awful.

Anna was great today. Although she is running a slight fever, 100 degrees or so, it's nothing too serious, we're just watching her closely.

I am better. Just dealing with the side effects of my antibiotics. And Brian feels better. It's funny because both of our ears are still popping. Oh well, it was worth the trip.

Happy days are here again. I am GRATEFUL.

I leave you with a picture of Anna in her outfit of the morning and a picture of Noah enjoying his snack from his Grandma's last night.

Happy Mother's Day!

I want to wish a Happy Mother's Day to every Mother out there. On this day, reflect on the role you play with your children. You teach, encourage, listen, nourish, honor and love. Remember to do the same for yourself. Do not forget to love yourself.

"A mother who radiates self-love and acceptance actually vaccinates her daughter against low self-esteem."
-Naomi Wolf

Fun with black and white. Fun being a Mom.

I know these last two pictures are not black and white, but they're pictures of Noah that were taken after a quick trip to the emergency room. On Thursday afternoon, as I was changing his diaper, I noticed his penis was terribly swollen. I immediately called the doctor and they were at lunch. Luckily I had my sister, Brian and Sara T. to keep me calm until I talked to a nurse. I finally talked to a nurse and she said as long as he is not in pain that it can wait until the following morning when they could squeeze us in. Well, after Brian got home, I told him to go look at it and it was worse then he had imagined and Noah was definitely showing signs of pain and it was MUCH MUCH LARGER. So, I paged a doctor and she said as long as he is urinating it could wait until the morning, but it wouldn't be a bad idea to take him in, if I wanted. I e-mailed a picture of it to Brian's Mom and she suggested taking him to the ER with the fear that throughout the night it may continue to swell and he won't be able to pee. It was huge, friends, huge. It looked like a huge red intertube underneath the head of the penis, it was not right. LUCKILY, by the Grace of God, there was NO WAIT at the emergency room. Crazy, huh? They diagnosed it as a severe yeast infection caused by the antibiotics he is on, prescribed a cream, checked his ears (one is still infected) and sent us on our merry way! Today, it's much better! It's still really red, but it's much smaller! I love this boy.

My weight loss journey

I had to laugh at Amy F's comment from last night's entry about my weight loss during my cruise. Let me start out by saying that because I was sick, it was really easy for me to become full and not finish eating. I can't smell anything, nor can I really taste anything. That really helps. However, with that said, I would have rather gained 5 lbs than been sick during the cruise. (and still be sick right now) I also had a goal to try to eat like someone who is a size 10, rather than a person who was a 14/16 who is temporarily wearing size 10 clothes. I am really trying to figure out when I am full and learn to be okay with not eating everything on my plate, no matter how good it tastes. I also walked alot and took stairs about 60% of the time. (10 floors on this ship, that's alot of stairs!)

I joined Weight Watchers in March of 2004, I weighed in at 208 pounds. I successfully lost weight, BUT I did not exercise and I saw my "healthy" eating habits as temporary. I would often think to myself "when I'm off WW, I can't wait to eat that or this...I'll just eat less." But I never taught myself to eat less. In September 2004 I weighed in at 166 lbs, my lowest weight, after that week I gained and continued to do so. By January 2005, my weight "crept" up to 188 pounds. By April I weighed 194.5 pounds. Since the first time I joined Weight Watchers I have re-joined SEVEN times. Last spring I even went as far as asking my doctor if there were any weight loss pills that he could prescribe to help me along. He said no, just eat healthier and exercise. I thought "I've done that, I'll just buy some pills over the counter." He must have heard my thoughts because he said because of my hypo-thyroidism and my high blood pressure, if I were to take any type of weight loss pill, especially those containing ephedrine, I could very well die of a heart attack. I never took a pill.

I joined on February 8th, 2006 to lose weight for our cruise. I have been incredibly focused from the start. In my first five weeks, I can honestly say I NEVER cheated. If I did throw something in my mouth that was not planned, I counted it. I felt instant results and I liked it. I also decided to join a gym, doing both programs made me see myself differently and made me feel different. I felt good. Healthy. Thinner. I have attended Weight Watchers meetings for 14 Wednesdays in a row, no matter what, I never miss. I often ask myself what is different about this time versus the other "failed" attempts, this is what I have come up with:

1. I want to be healthy, not just skinny. (thank you, Penny for pointing that out)
2. After watching so many Oprahs about being a woman and being healthy, they always say to eat healthy and excercise. I figured they're probably not wrong.
3. I view eating poorly as doing something negative to me. I COULD stop and get a milkshake or sneak one silly little french fry, but why would I do that to myself? I take it personally.
4. I love having energy. Energy means alot to me. Between my low thyroid and my extra weight I was constantly tired, now I am not.
5. As mentioned before, weekly meetings. It means alot to me to go in and lose weight every week. It means something to me to know I am not alone. I take pride in my recognition. Last night, someone at my meeting, who joined in December and who regularly attends, stopped me and said "Beth, you look really good." I don't know why but that compliment from that person meant the world to me.
6. Most importantly, my heart is in it. If your heart is not in the program, you can't be successful. (explains the seven failed attempts, my heart just wasn't in it.) I recently learned that "to discipline" means "to teach." I am very disciplined. But at the same time, I hope I am teaching myself to eat right, learn when I am full and love my new found health and do everything it takes to hold on to it.
7. I have an incredible network of support, others doing the program along side me. Great cheerleaders and motivators make such a difference.
8. I don't always resist temptation, but when I do, I pat myself on the back, feeling great pride. When I don't resist, I get over it and run towards the next hurdle, knowing there are more.
9. I plan my meals almost every single day. Every point is planned ahead of time. This is really important.

So, there really are no secrets. I just follow the program. I keep saying to myself that there is nothing wrong with the program. That if I fail on this program, the program didn't fail me, I did. And I refuse to fail.

American Idol Sucks

That's all I have to say about that. The bright side is that by him not winning, he could have an even bigger opportunity to become a huge success. (I'm deliberately not saying a name just in case someone is going to watch it later.)

On to other news, I'm still sick, but Noah is much better. Much. Much better.

I lost 2.4 lbs this past week, I've lost a total of 29.6 pounds, if I lose .4 lbs this next week then I officially hit my goal weight. I'm very excited.

We left for our cruise last Thursday morning, we drove away from our house at 4am. The day before was spent furiously trying to pack, do laundry, take care of sicks kids and clean. We attempted to go to bed at 11:30pm, but that didn't work, it was closer to midnight, but I couldn't sleep. I laid there and worried about Noah, stressed about packing, and thought of about 5 things I needed to do before leaving at 4am. After laying there for 2 hours, I just got out of bed and took care of those five things and painted my nails. I never slept. I didn't sleep until we were on the boat and I slept for about 90 minutes, but it was enough. I guess that night of no sleep didn't help my sickness any. I woke up and showered and was rejuvenated!

Here is a link to some of our cruise pictures, if you look at it as a slideshow, you'll miss some explanations and descriptions, if you want descriptions, just click on the thumbnail and when the picture becomes big on the left, the description is underneath.
Enjoy!
Cruise pictures!

Home

Just a quick update for you! We arrived home about 24 hours ago. We had an amazing time. Unfortunately the sickness is still very much in our home. While we were gone, Noah just continued to get worse, Brian's mom took Noah back to the doctor Friday morning where his ears were still very red and he also had a touch of pneumonia, they prescribed a different antibiotic. Saturday was his worst day, well, everyone's worst day. We completely lost contact with everyone Friday afternoon, which made me crazy that we couldn't find out how he was doing. He's doing better now, he still has some recovering to do, but day by day he's getting better. Today he took a 3 and a half hour nap and we woke him up! Tonight after getting his pajamas on, he said "here Mama, take my hand," he walked me into his room, turned off his light and said "there, that's better" walked to his crib and said "I want my bed." I put him in his bed and he laid down and went to sleep. My tired little boy. We feel as if both of the children of aged tremondously since we left. This morning Anna told me she missed me about 25 times followed with hugs and kisses and then this afternoon she said "Mama I missed you so hard!!" oh, how we missed them!

I also remained sick throughout the trip, even after finishing my antibiotic on Sunday. I went back to the doctor to learn I have a severe sinus infection and bronchitis. (Brian doesn't feel well either!) Hopefully this new antibiotic will start kicking this infection's ass REAL soon. And I have "sea legs." No matter where I am, I feel like I am swaying, I really need that to end!

I will leave you with a picture taken in Key West and a picture of our ship. The ship picture I took while in Mexico. Oh and no, we did not want to wear matching shirts, but Pampered Chef asked us to for one day, so since they sent us on this trip for free and treated us like royalty, we thought we could do them this one favor! :-)

Blog on a log

I'm too tired to Blog. Blog is such an ugly word. It's an official word now, did you know that? You can use it while playing Scrabble. Learn something new everyday.

I'm too tired to blog, but I'm doing it anyway. I know I have some faithful readers and I want to apologize because I feel like my on-line journal (trying not to use the word BLOG) has become a real downer to read, morose, depressing, negative. I'm really not that type of person, I'm just feeling a bit defeated, that's all. (I promise I'll get better!!) :-)

Thursday morning, at 3:45AM, we will be pulling out of our garage to head to O'Hare airport. I should be thinking about the fact that we will be heading towards an amazing, FREE vacation, something we completely need and deserve. Instead, I'll be thinking about the fact that I'll be leaving my very sick child. I can hardly stand the thought, I've become choked up so many times tonight at the thought. I can't even stand the thought of going to my Weight Watcher meeting because I feel so bad. (I'm gone for less than an hour.) I'm just so sad that this is happening right now.

Today started out so much better, Noah had a very good night, despite being sick, he slept until 8:40am. He woke up yelling "HI MOMMA! HI MOMMA" It was music to my ears. And although he didn't eat much, he played and played. Something I didn't see yesterday. Well, I put him down for his nap and then I had a doctor's appointment myself, because, I am sick, too. I came home and opened the door and saw this child that made me want to weep. He looked so tired and so sad and his eyes seemed so little, he had so much puss oozing from his eyes and the snot streaming down his nose was dark and endless. (sorry to be gross) I immediately came in and cleaned his face off, which is when I noticed that he was so warm, hot. He was breathing fast, shallow breaths. He's done this before but tonight it was worse. I took his temperature and he was at 104. I decided to page the doctor. She called back and was concerned, but told me to increase his Tylenol, (I wasn't giving him enough) wait 30 minutes, give him a luke warm bath and take his temperature again. If he is still "panting," as she called it, call her back right away. I did as she said and his temperature dropped to 102.6 and his panting slowed down. (she compared the panting to what a dog does when it is hot, it pants. A child will do the same thing to try to fight the fever. Interesting. No?)

So, we went to Walgreens to pick up even more prescriptions, came home and he played again. I need to learn to just put him into bed, even if he's playing. The poor boy is so tired, but will play if the house is on fire. As soon as I laid him down he turned on his side and shut his eyes. Poor little guy. I'm praying that he feels better tomorrow. I'm so scared to see what his eyes will look like in the morning, they continued to ooze all night tonight.

And yes, I have a sinus infection. I'm really concerned about going into an airplane with my sinuses so plugged up, but my doctor gave me medication to combat that problem. So, I think I'll head into bed and get a good night's sleep, considering tomorrow night will be a short night.

Today I told Anna we were leaving for vacation, believe me, she is not sad, she's excited! She loves to have her Oma come over. I said we are going on a cruise on a big ship, do you want to see a picture? She replied "sure, great idea!" So, I showed her the boat and she said "you're going on the ocean?" My girl is so smart. Tonight, I told her we were going to Mexico and we were going to bring her back a present "she said from Mexico and America?" My girl is wicked smart.

Don't miss me while I'm gone! Well, you can if you want to.

Poor little guy

Today started out sooooooooooooo bad. The kids woke up incredibly early, it was difficult for me to even go brush my teeth, they didn't eat a good breakfast and both of them were sick. (It was one of those days where I asked Anna "do you want orange juice or milk?" "Milk" I poured the milk and gave it to her and she says "I want juice." So, I did give her juice and it wound up on the floor, so I was mopping the entire kitchen floor by 9:30am.) Anna has had a cold for 10 days and Noah started to get a cold this past Thursday. Noah cried through breakfast and Anna coughed through breakfast. I decided to call the doctor. I called right at 9am and they told me to come in at noon. We had SO SO SO MUCH to do today, so I took the kids to one city that is 15 miles east of my house to run some necessary errands and then drove to another city 10 miles west of my house to see the doctor. Noah's temperature was at 100.2, on Tylenol and Anna's temperature was good. Noah essentially cried through the entire visit, which is just not like him. Anna was given cough medicine and my poor, little baby boy was given an antibiotic for a double ear infection. I feel so bad for him. He really hasn't eaten much and he's so tired, but he won't sleep unless it's nap time or time for bed. My biggest concern (which those words do not even describe my feelings) is Noah's fever which has spiked to 104. Early today he was on both Tylelonol and ibuprofen and his temp was still 102.6. So, needless to say, this has been what I've been doing today. I feel so bad for him. (did I say that already?) His little lips are red and his head is so warm, but he's the best boy in the world. I've attached some pictures from tonight and some pictures from his first day of Sunday School yesterday. I SWEAR I didn't know he was this sick. I feel just terrible. But, what can you do?

Eating applesauce! YAY!! (103.5 degree fever in this picture)

He's finally playing. This was after eating some dinner and eating yogurt and strawberries. 102 degree fever. I just love this picture.

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Sunday School Pictures!

(this is a picture of Noah, Anna and their friend Kevin from Sunday school, we went to get Noah's haircut after church and Kevin and his family were there. I loved the way the three kids played together.)